STTPR - Bloody Good Gift Ideas For Aussies

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Interactive Dog Ball Launcher

Does your dog love fetching tennis balls but you find it hard to hold a beer, a cigarette AND throw a ball at the same time? Your worries are over with this interactive dog ball launcher! It can launch a ball different distances and keep your dog amused for hours – you can even teach him to use it himself!

$379.99

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Electric Can Opener

We all love the fact that wide-mouth beer cans make it quicker and easier to get you to the point where you’re comfortable texting your ex. Supercharge your beer drinking experience by using this electric can opener to just take the whole top off and down that beer like its water. Also work with less fun things like canned tomatoes.

$33.99

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Star Wars BB-8 Mug

We know. Your R2-D2 mug has served you just fine for 30 years. Righto Grandad, but some of the new Star Wars movies aren’t too bad, and BB-8 is a cool little sidekick. If you know a Star Wars purist who needs some upgraded gear, this is the gift for them. Just don’t mention The Last Jedi.

$40.00

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Magnetic Wristband For Tradies

Sick of driving your family members to the hospital for tetanus shots because they’ve stepped on a nail you’ve dropped while generally making all handyman jobs worse? No more emergency room visits for you with this handy magnetic wristband where you can keep those loose nails.

$10.99

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Secret Sunscreen Flask

Summer is a time of fun, but there’s always somebody trying to rain on your parade and stop you drinking in public. Police, family members, even other parents and your kid’s sporting events. Well now you can hide 230ml of booze inside this fake tube of sunscreen. The perfect gift for an alcoholic ginger.

$18.95

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Chardonnay Making Kit

You know that one Aunty who always seems to have a full glass of chardonnay at any party? Everyone knows she sneaks over to the cask and refills when she thinks nobody is watching. But we’re all watching, and we think you have a problem. Buy this for her, so she can at least make her own secret stash.

$60.00

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Like a Boss Mug

You’ve just done the Secret Santa draw at work and have to buy a gift for your boss. Do you get something funny? No, they’ve got no sense humour. Something thoughtful? Come on, it’s your boss. Why not get this ‘Like A Boss’ mug. They’ll think it’s great, even if you’re really telling them they’re only ‘Like A Boss’.

$25.00

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The Pickle Rick Game

If you’re sick of the same old board games, why not try this Pickle Rick game. Of course, the board keeps changing as you play, so it will be as difficult to follow as the actual show. But that’s what we love about it! Not suitable for sober people, and if playing as Pickle Rick himself, womanising is advised.

$66.56

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Turn Yourself Into a Pokemon Card

After my 74th hour straight playing Pokemon Go, my partner said, “If you love that bloody game so much, why don’t you just become a Pokemon?” Obviously this was a big wake up call to me. So I finally got my image on a Pokemon card. I can’t wait to show Linda. If you find her, tell her to call me. Please?

$84.05

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Mr Men Complete Collection

If you haven’t heard of Mr Men books, there is a possibility you’re a genetically engineered adult. Actually, even then, your creators would have programmed you with artificial memories of Mr Men books. Now you can get the entire collection of this popular set of children’s books, which are based on the day-to-day goings on of the Australian parliament.

$99.99

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Make 300 Bottles Of Your Own Luxury Wine

Not everybody gets the chance to work with an award-winning winemaker to create their own batch of luxury wine. So if you’re looking for a great way to use some company money as a tax-deductible team building exercise, why not book this luxury winemaking package? You get to keep the vino too, so there’s the Christmas party sorted.

$13,890.00

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Never Ending Birthday Card

There has never been a more spiteful gift. Perfect for co-workers who think your sarcastic remarks towards them are just harmless fun. Once opened, this card will play Happy Birthday continuously. Closing the card won’t help. It keeps going. And going. You can destroy the card, but when you do, glitter goes everywhere. We all know someone this card is perfect for.

$19.99

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Drive a Stunt Car

Have you got a friend who fancies themselves as a bit of a daredevil? That one person you’ve stopped driving with because you fear for your life? Chances are, while you’re in the passenger seat crying, they’re wondering if they’re really driving recklessly enough. With this course, you can help them become more dangerous than a taxi driver in peak hour.

$249.00

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Killer Whale Submarine

Before you complain about the price tag here, don’t worry – this can be yours for 4 simple payments of $57,200 on Afterpay. It sounds like a lot, but if your garden variety submarine won’t cut it, you’ll need this one styled like a killer whale. Kim Jong-un uses one in the summer holidays, and that should be enough of an endorsement.

$228,800.00

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Grow Your Own Sloth

We don’t have sloths in Australia, but we do have public servants. Since nobody has invented a ‘Grow-an-ATO-Employee’ toy, the next best thing must be this super cool toy from Cool Things. When your kid begs for a puppy and promises to clean up after it, distract them with this little guy who only needs water to grow.

$7.00

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Personal Portable Sauna

Quite often, I need to make a difficult choice between reading a book or going to the sauna. We’re all time-poor, right? Thankfully, this is no longer an issue thanks to this portable sauna which has head and arm holes so you can successfully dehydrate and tighten up your skin while being able to read the latest self-help book about healthy living.

$239.99

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Secret Hitler

Since the 1940’s, the market for Hitler-related board games has really dried up, much in the way you don’t see a lot of kids named Adolf anymore. 70 years on though, Hitler games have never been more popular since Call of Duty tackled the difficult WW2 setting. Seriously though, this game isn’t offensive, it’s a fun, politically-themed game you and your friends will love!

$45.99

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Baby Werewolf in Sheeps Clothing

Well this is probably the creepiest thing you'll find on this site. This little wolf in sheeps clothing is a unique gift that is handmade and... I can't even think straight enough to write this description. Very creepy, very interesting. Buy one for your kids if you want them to never sleep again.

$1,026.23

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